Terrified of Death, the Only True Peace

Terrified of Death, the Only True Peace

To stand alive before you judge is to acknowledge failure,
To acknowledge that I am in too sick to know what is best,
Why is it when you choke at a presentation and forget what to say,
…or when you slip and fall on a wet bathroom floor,

The end is so clearly laid out for you, lost job or a cracked skull,
Both a fast death, but this bipolar hell is to die from the inside,
She’s always there, the chance you ask is, do you want to live?
Doc, Judge, I don’t know, I won’t lie to you, I don’t know,

I’m starting to get jealous of my reflection, ask the water if there is a heaven,
I’m already in hell, I see more plastic in the river each year, it’s there,
Why don’t you fix that? What’s wrong with me.
Please have my money on time, please have my money on time, next!

About kayaerbil

I am a Berkeley educated chemistry Ph.D. who is moving into the area of working on developing appropriate technology for communities that are subjected to socio-economic oppression. The goal is to use simple and effective designs to empower people to live better lives. Currently, I am working with Native Americans on Pine Ridge, the Lakota reservation in South Dakota. I am working with a Native owned and run solar energy company. We are currently working on building a compressed earth block (CEB) house that showcases many of the technologies that the company has developed. The CEB house is made of locally derived resources, earth from the reservation. The blocks are naturally thermally insulating, keeping the house cool in the summer and warm in the winter. Eventually, a solar air heater and photovoltaic panels will be installed into the house to power the home and keep it warm, while preserving the house off the grid. A side project while in Pine Ridge is a solar computer. I hope to learn about blockchain encryption software for building microgrids. In addition, it is an immediate interest of mine to involve local youth in technology education.
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